I like your observations on the short names, but I have to tell you that you are wrong about presidential drinking habits. Jimmy Carter did imbibe small doses of wine, whereas W. Bush abstained by the time he became president, and both Trump and Biden have never tasted a drop of alcohol in their lives, so they would not be having beers with you. (That said, despite his status as a non-drinker, I find President Joe incredibly likeable.)